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By Kevin B. Howell
Currently, I have just over 200 friends on Facebook, a modest
number when put in perspective of the bloated 1,300-plus "friends" some
people carry. But honestly,who has 1,300 friends? Who
even has 200? Or 100? I think Facebook needs to change the name from
"Friends" to "People you sort of know," because that's all it is
really. You bump into some one at a function, and a day later a friend
request pops up from him/her. I guess that's why it's called social networking. 
In real life, outside of cyber space, we exchange business cards or email addresses with random people we meet, whether it's for business or sport. Of course, we wouldn't call these people our friends. Heck, I wouldn't deem them acquaintances, but they are a part of our social nework.
Facebook puts the cyber social network on a more personal level. You probably wouldn't show photos of a recent party where you, well, let your hair down a bit, to someone you just bumped into at the barbershop, gym, or business function. Nor would you share what you did throughout your weekend with them. Yet, that's the info we make available to these new "friends" on Facebook. I think Facebook has ingeniously capitalized on the trend of the 21st Century: watered-down friendships.
I guess my problem with Facebook is more of a problem with society overall. It's become too impersonal. The technological advancements have given us more and easier ways to stay connected with people, yet it has reduced interpersonal communication to rapid-fire text messages, status updates, grammatically-incorrect wall posts and 250-character tweets. We already had busy lives where finding time for a heart-to-heart with friends was difficult, but when MySpace invaded our space, it gave us a quick fix for our faltering friendships. What seemed like a simple solution for our hectic schedules has turned into a social revolution, redefining friendships and substituting real conversations with insufficient exchange.Granted, I'm regularly on Facebook and have accepted more people as friends than who truly carry that title. I love the way I can say a quick hello to someone I haven't seen in a while, share photos, or find old friends, since Facebook is the new Yellowpages. But if I confine these friendships to my laptop or phone app, which I have done at times, is it truly a friendship, or just a surface-level relationship?
Unfortunately, more times than not, it's the latter. Though some relationships were meant to function on that level, others should be deeper. A true friend is not only one who responds to your texts promptly, uses photos of the two of you as his/her profile pic, or follows your every move on Twitter. Real friendship steps out of the social network and into our lives. It is there, not online, where bonds are formed, loyalty is tested, tears are shed, and life is shared.
Kevin is the founder and editor of Transparency Magazine. He spends more time on Facebook than he should, and hopes to keep his "friend" count to a minimum.Post Your Comments |
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